Warning: this post may come off as a little bit of a rant, but that's why I'm writing it. So be forewarned - this is not meant to be offensive, but it may be, so I'm adding a disclaimer: I am not to be held responsible for the backlash caused by the truth in this post.
I have recently been introduced to the fact that all guys are the same, no matter what they might make you think. However, there are some guys that might have a better prospect than others, so I'm writing this in the hopes that when the right guy reads this, he'll take it to heart. So here goes: these are just a few things that men should know about us girls.
I have recently been introduced to the fact that all guys are the same, no matter what they might make you think. However, there are some guys that might have a better prospect than others, so I'm writing this in the hopes that when the right guy reads this, he'll take it to heart. So here goes: these are just a few things that men should know about us girls.
- We like to lay our feelings out on the table, and we would appreciate it if you'd do the same every once in a while. You don't have to write a novel about how you felt about your morning coffee, but we'd like a little emotion and honesty once in a blue moon. If you like us, tell us. If you don't, tell us. If you're bored, tell us. If you don't want a relationship, tell us. If you do, tell us. If you're totally confused about what you want, tell us. We don't like being in the dark about how you're feeling. That just digs at our confidence and we never know whether or not we're just wasting our time waiting for you to come around.
- We don't like being ignored. Okay. We understand you're "busy" and you "have a lot of studying to do," but what do you think we do with OUR lives? We have stuff to do to, especially when we're bogged down with insane premed course loads. It doesn't take an hour to just shoot us a text saying, "Sorry, I'm really busy today, but I'll talk to you soon. :)" If you don't want to talk to us, just say so. Don't leave us hanging. Refer back to #1.
- We think about you all the time. Even if we don't know that much about you, we'll see little things every five seconds that remind us about you. If we get a second of free time, we're not ashamed to admit that we'll creep your Facebook photos for the tenth time. We'd rather that free time be spent talking to you, but that's a different story. Note: when you're not talking to us, that just gives us more time to fixate on why. And when girls fixate, bad things happen. Like this blog post, for example.
- We don't really care what you look like. Sure, we like to daydream about Channing Tatum and Leonardo DiCaprio, but with them, looks is all we know. When it comes to being in a real relationship, the way you act and treat us is what we really like. If you've got a crooked ear or a little pudge in a place you don't want it to be, we don't care. We've got a list of our own insecurities that's probably ten times longer than yours, so we understand. Also, if a girl points out your flaws, knowing you're insecure about them, she's a jerk.
- We assume all you want is sex until you prove us wrong. This is where the "all guys are the same" thing comes in. Some guys will just flat out say that all they want is the physical part of a relationship, and sometimes that works, if you get the right girl. But the other 99% of the time, that's the last thing a girl is thinking about. She wants a real emotional connection and a commitment before anything like that happens. When you've got a girl that respects herself more than to just let you do whatever you want to her, hold onto her and never let her go! No girl will ever respect you if she doesn't respect herself. So, prove to her that you're different and you want something more before you try anything on her. Because most of the time, she won't like it. At all.
- Be careful what you say, because we will remember it forever. It doesn't matter if you're tired, drunk, or confused, whatever you say to her goes in one ear and stays in her head forever. Don't use your current state as an excuse because you "didn't mean it". Back to the fixation thing: we will analyze everything you say until it cannot be analyzed any more. We can bend it to mean what we want it to mean, and we'll bend it back in the other direction so it means something completely different. Then we'll analyze the probability of each meaning based on the current relationship status, time of day, intonation of voice, and maybe even the weather outside. So WATCH IT. If you don't mean it 100% the way you say it, DON'T SAY IT.
- There's nothing wrong with asking her out on a date. This doesn't mean you're gonna get married. It doesn't mean you have to be on your best behavior. It doesn't mean you're committed. It just means you like her and you'd like to spend time with her. If you're too chicken to say that out loud, ask her out to dinner. She'll know what you mean. Although we DO like Netflix movie marathons and lounging around in sweatpants, that is NOT what we want to do every other weekend when we finally get to see you.
- Sometimes you need to let your guard down. This one is simple. We can tell if you're not all in. If you're afraid of something, we want to know. We love it when you confide in us, because that means you trust us. And we would do anything to keep your trust. A girl that spills a secret is not a girl you want to have around. Start out slow, but let her know you want her to know your true self, and not just what everyone else sees.
- We like it when you're territorial. We want to be protected and shown off, so when you seem indifferent about the whole thing, that's a turn off. Tell us we're yours, and we'll melt. But again, don't say it unless you mean it.
- Do it, or don't. When it comes to being in a real adult relationship, there is no halfway. You either want this or you don't. Don't assume we're just sitting at home waiting for the phone to ring. We've got lives to live too. As much as we would hate to admit it, we know deep in our hearts when you're not into us. We can tell. So don't lead us on. Don't tell us what we want to hear just to get something from us. Don't keep something halfway alive just because you're confused. Do it, or get out.